The chaotic normal

 The Chaotic Normal

 How to feel normal when everything around is normal? 

 I have never felt normal around me in my whole life so what do I do now?

Like I am happily normal now! is that even a thing?

Are birds chirping a normal thing? Sky forming different colors and patterns a normal thing?

Laughing with friends and family a normal thing? I don't know. 

I have never lived a normal phase in my life then what is happening right now? How is everything normal around me? 

Am I too habitual around the chaos that I feel this too normal around me? The silence is new to me. 

Is this chaos a new normal for me? 

This chaotic normal is a new normal for me. 

Am I so hurt that I don't feel a thing in this chaos?

What is this stillness of emotions that I find this chaos a normal thing.  

When does it get better? When does it feel better? 

At the end of the day do we still survive or we pretend to survive?